Monday, August 24, 2015

Holy Dinah! I wrote an empty post...

How did this happen? I wrote a post headline with no body in the text box. Well, let me explain - sometimes the only way I can see my list of posts to edit is to pretend I'm putting in a new one. So I just fire up a fake post title and put it to post weeks down the line - hoping I will come back and fill it out or delete it. Well, we know what I did don't we? Why? Because for the last month I've been completely absorbed in a program - when not working (which has been intense all on its own) I've been taking a drawing course. When I wasn't working or drawing, I was meditating. When I wasn't working, drawing or meditating, I was sleeping, eating, bathing, or ahem, or likely, watching Nashville. I took a revision break as my mentor-editor was doing so. As of today I will be back in the saddle with lots of ideas and energy. Okay... maybe not so many ideas and perhaps my energy is a bit low - but still. I'm back. I'm not entirely sure I can revise in the morning like I was doing (up at 5:30 to revise for an hour and a half) because I'm having some health problems that are causing me to sleep poorly. I still get up but it is pretty uninspired wakefulness if you get me.
My plan is to work for at least an hour a day with a bit more on the weekends. I have that early September feeling so should be able to do this. My drawing habit is well-established and that takes me at least a half-hour a day. Meditation is between 40 minutes and 60 right now. I can do my drawing here at work on lunch-time. I will have to do this as I do have a deadline with my mentor-editor that is coming up. I'm inspired - or maybe I'm faking it until I am. Yes, that.

Next topic - home sickness.
Oh, here is a visitor to the land program I was on for 7 days ... Yep, and he was a very big fella. So big and so persistent that we all came back to base camp. gah.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Busting through Insecurity

If you are reading this, it must be August 5th and time for a meeting of The Insecure Writers Support Group. I'm trying to work with my mind on my insecurity these days. I don't find it helpful to hold a core belief that I'm "too old, too busy, too boring" to write anything worthwhile. How do I bust through this belief? I look for evidence that contradicts such a belief. I search out others who began their artistic endeavors when older than the norm. I found Grandma Moses who didn't start painting until she was 78 and ended up being considered successful by her nineties (one of her paintings went for 1.2 million a few years ago). Mary Wesley (The Camomile Lawn) had her first adult book published when she was 70. She was extremely prolific from her 70s into her 90s. That gives me hope, as I loved Camomile Lawn.
What about the core belief that I'm too boring to write anything worthwhile? Well, the truth is that I'm told I'm not.  I have led a wildly full life, travelled plenty on this continent and a bit in Europe. I've been married a couple of times, raised my own children and helped with the raising of a few others. I've worked widely too - from a nurse's aide in an old folk's home to a real lumberjack (official title - choker bunny), to a cook in a very good restaurant, to a psychotherapist, and many more in between. I've created plays and photos and gatherings. So... maybe I'm not boring, though an interesting life isn't the same as having something to say and saying it well. I suppose, when I feel the downward tug of insecurity, I must remind myself that I write because I write. I write to learn the world. It will have to do.
a photo of Prospect taken back a ways.

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Cross-training

I'm part of a group show of artists that opens tonight. I have ten photos (mostly of North West River beach, all of Labrador ). It was fun to help organize (l did most of the publicity ) and definitely great to get so many images printed and up on the wall. What will it be like to be at the opening and hear folk talk about them? I'm used to pretty instant feedback from writing and directing plays, but writing novels and poems is a very private enterprise. Even when you're published you don't necessarily get immediate response except at readings.



Well,  I'll see how I am with it tonight.  Here's a photo that isn't in the show but similar!

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Just Bloody Well Show Up

This ain't rocket science. It ain't science at all. It is cause and effect. If I sit down and work for an hour every day I'll be finished this revision in eleven days. Period. Then I can ship it off to the ms doctor and we can see where we're at then. At a certain point I'll be done. Yes. I'll be done. Not sort of done, or shelved for later - but done until someone who wants to buy it tells me different. That certain point will come sooner than later if I put my arse in my chair and finish this revision.

I've begun again.

The magic of those ordinary, everyday words. I've begun again.


Friday, July 10, 2015

Disruptions, distractions and bedevilment

Ten whole days since I posted. A week ago I was in the truck with Ron making our way from New Brunswick to northern Quebec. Now, I'm finishing up my first week back at work and it seems like my three weeks home never happened. Life is a dream - sha boom sha boom.

The trouble with vacations is that one's routine gets disrupted. I had been getting up at about 5 or 5:30 in the morning to work on my revision. Since I've been back I haven't done that. I was going to say that I haven't been able to - but how could that be true? Of course, I could. I just haven't. While I was away I did some work on my ms - I had a hard copy of most of the revision with me and worked on Ron's laptop. But it wasn't very satisfactory - hard to work without a desk or even a table. I managed to stay in touch with my work though and felt that was good. Until the last week - then it all went away. Too much disruption, distraction and bedevilment.

Now, how do I get back on the path? I plan to work on it this weekend. No reason why not - I have some chores to do and an art show to help prepare for (a group show where I'll have some photos) but I should be able to put in at least four hours.

The weather is crap. Cold and rainy. I think they had summer here while we were in Nova Scotia where it was cold and rainy. I'm trying not to be sooky but damn! I want some beach. Anywhoozie - good for writing.

It was truly fun to see Death, the Musical performed in Chester. The actors all did an amazing job and the music was heavenly. I saw lots of old pals - some that I hadn't seen in years.

Hope everyone is having a lovely summer (or winter for those of you in the southern hemisphere) and I'll see you around the water cooler.